It was only a potential short journey from Bago to our hotel in Yangon. We estimated an hour or so.
Our security guard at the hotel in Bago flagged us down a local bus on the main road as all the destinations were in Burmese and assured us it was going to Yangon. It was a heap of a local bus, as usual being driven by a maniac who was dressed like an Arab terrorist and chewing betel nut like it was going out of fashion.(betel nut is a mild stimulant which makes your mouth go all red like a vampire). Clearly he had too much betel nut as his driving was erratic to put it kindly and his mate who doubled up as fare collector and chief spitter out the front door while distracting him with the latest phone messages from love lorn single selfie addicts. It was an action packed journey seeing how fast a thirty year old ex-school bus could go. Then it suddenly stopped and they told us all to get off and get on another bus adjacent which was already full and had headroom of only 5.5ft so yours truly had to stand with my back hunched over to avoid penetrating the roof with my dome head on the bumps. This clearly was not going to work as I kept falling onto the other seated passengers so a kindly back row of the bus shuffled up and wedged me in with them so tightly that I could not move an inch as I had my legs rammed up the back of the seat in front with my knees perched underneath my chin. Luckily after 15 minutes they told us all to get off again in the middle of nowhere and told us this was the end of the line. Looked like we had been stitched up again! Still 10km from our hotel and the heat rising we had to barter with a very stroppy Taxi driver who felt hard done by even though he overcharged us by 50%.
The Beautyland hotel was awesome, in a leafy neighbourhood by the lake and from the rooftop breakfast terrace it overlooked the main event, the stunning Shwedagon pagoda. The rest of the day we just unpacked and went for something to eat and done a bit of Christmas shopping for decorations as our room was a bit sparse Xmas wise. Kathy scored some cool led flashy lights and some tinsel and made some 'snowy stars' out of our mountain of used mineral water bottles, a pair of scissors and sellotape (take that Blue Peter!)
Next day was hot and sunny so we had a very chilled walk around the lake which took all morning, went back to the hotel for lunch then on to a massive Buddha that was standing for a change in the afternoon which was pretty average after the 455 Buddhas we had already seen that day. Then onto (surprise!) a massive reclining Buddha who had the most beautiful glass eyes that were blue and massive eyelashes that made it look very fetching in an androgynous type of way. We looked for somewhere to eat and found a place called Misfits cafe which suited us just fine, with rooftop views across the sunset of the city. We played a game there called pirate Sam where you push swords into the barrel and if you lose his head springs up and bounces across the floor and makes a lot of noise. The staff found it amusing anyway.
Next day we got a cab from our GRAB app on the phone which we found was working again which was a relief as we found the taxi's to be really cheap. You could go almost anywhere in town for £1-1.50. It took us to the Drug Elimination Museum which was a huge building totally dedicated to the Burmese government's war on drugs which had a touch of irony as Burma is the second highest producer of opium poppies which of course is a class A drug. The Museum was empty apart from the cleaners and some pigeons in the roof space. The displays ranged from serious, to propaganda, to comical, but the best bit was the display of all the kinds of seized drugs by the the government troops, a nice display glass case with nice labels of all the drugs types but all the cases were empty! Looks like the staff had a good time at their Xmas party.
After that another cab ride to Shwedagon pagoda to check out one of the 'must sees' of Asia and we were not disappointed. It was gold, gold, gold everywhere you looked and the scale was impressive.
Take your shoes off though! We spent a while here people watching and monk spying as there was a shady gang of monks hanging out. Photos done we ambled back to the hotel and that night decided we were going for what is known as a Chinese hotpot. For the uninitiated, what this compromises is a boiling hot cauldron of soup in the middle of your table on a hotplate. We chose half spicy Szechuen and half chicken, and you go and choose your ingredients from the fridges. A waiter then collects everything and takes it to your table with beers etc and sets you up with everything you need to start cooking in the boiling soup. You put in what you want bit by bit like a fondue or put the lot in and have a big nosh up. It's a great way to socialise.
Next day was Christmas day and we spent the morning playing cheesy Xmas tunes and opening presents which were extremely limited and mostly travel related and then off outside to the Peoples park via another taxi ride. The park was rammed with all the Burmese taking the day off so we chilled out in the shade with ice-creams as it was so hot. It had rides there like a log flume and roller coasters but the queues were too long and the sight of a gang of mechanics working on the roller coaster in front of the queue did not inspire confidence in us to have a go. It was all a bit surreal sitting there on Xmas day in 32c sun with shorts and scandals on watching Burmese people strolling about in their Sunday best.
It proved very entertaining for a couple of hours. Then the magical music fountain started up shooting powerful high jets of water into the air making brilliant rainbows as it mixed with the strong sun. The water pulsing along with the super cheesy beats of the song being played at massive decibels across the park.
As the afternoon shadows lengthened we headed downtown for the first time since being here and were really disappointed. It was traffic choked, polluted, noisy, crowded and dingy. We wandered about for a little while but were uninspired so decided to head for an area called beer street (19th street to the locals) which was a bit of a dive to be honest but had a lot of character and made for some good pavement banter as the beers were cheap on draught and cold so went down quicker than we planned for. After watching all the flies hanging out on all the food stuffs on display spreading their assortment of bowel moving bacteria we decided it would be wise to eat somewhere with a bit more hygiene orientated in nature. Funny enough we thought we could get a Christmas dinner but no chance, as it was impossible just to find somewhere that flies were not part of the meal being served. Eventually we found a nice gaff that was a bit upmarket but had to settle for Pad Thai for Christmas dinner as fermented fish head stew didn't really float our boat.
Another taxi back to the room which took ages as all the streets were gridlocked with the evenings Xmas celebrations and treated ourselves by cracking open a bottle of wine to round the night off.
In the morning we would pack as we have to head for the airport for our new year destination which is big, bad, Bangkok.
Our security guard at the hotel in Bago flagged us down a local bus on the main road as all the destinations were in Burmese and assured us it was going to Yangon. It was a heap of a local bus, as usual being driven by a maniac who was dressed like an Arab terrorist and chewing betel nut like it was going out of fashion.(betel nut is a mild stimulant which makes your mouth go all red like a vampire). Clearly he had too much betel nut as his driving was erratic to put it kindly and his mate who doubled up as fare collector and chief spitter out the front door while distracting him with the latest phone messages from love lorn single selfie addicts. It was an action packed journey seeing how fast a thirty year old ex-school bus could go. Then it suddenly stopped and they told us all to get off and get on another bus adjacent which was already full and had headroom of only 5.5ft so yours truly had to stand with my back hunched over to avoid penetrating the roof with my dome head on the bumps. This clearly was not going to work as I kept falling onto the other seated passengers so a kindly back row of the bus shuffled up and wedged me in with them so tightly that I could not move an inch as I had my legs rammed up the back of the seat in front with my knees perched underneath my chin. Luckily after 15 minutes they told us all to get off again in the middle of nowhere and told us this was the end of the line. Looked like we had been stitched up again! Still 10km from our hotel and the heat rising we had to barter with a very stroppy Taxi driver who felt hard done by even though he overcharged us by 50%.
 |
| Breakfast view of the Shwedagon pagoda made getting out of bed a lot easier. |
The Beautyland hotel was awesome, in a leafy neighbourhood by the lake and from the rooftop breakfast terrace it overlooked the main event, the stunning Shwedagon pagoda. The rest of the day we just unpacked and went for something to eat and done a bit of Christmas shopping for decorations as our room was a bit sparse Xmas wise. Kathy scored some cool led flashy lights and some tinsel and made some 'snowy stars' out of our mountain of used mineral water bottles, a pair of scissors and sellotape (take that Blue Peter!)
Next day was hot and sunny so we had a very chilled walk around the lake which took all morning, went back to the hotel for lunch then on to a massive Buddha that was standing for a change in the afternoon which was pretty average after the 455 Buddhas we had already seen that day. Then onto (surprise!) a massive reclining Buddha who had the most beautiful glass eyes that were blue and massive eyelashes that made it look very fetching in an androgynous type of way. We looked for somewhere to eat and found a place called Misfits cafe which suited us just fine, with rooftop views across the sunset of the city. We played a game there called pirate Sam where you push swords into the barrel and if you lose his head springs up and bounces across the floor and makes a lot of noise. The staff found it amusing anyway.
 |
| Reclining Buddha had the worst foot odour ever. |
Next day we got a cab from our GRAB app on the phone which we found was working again which was a relief as we found the taxi's to be really cheap. You could go almost anywhere in town for £1-1.50. It took us to the Drug Elimination Museum which was a huge building totally dedicated to the Burmese government's war on drugs which had a touch of irony as Burma is the second highest producer of opium poppies which of course is a class A drug. The Museum was empty apart from the cleaners and some pigeons in the roof space. The displays ranged from serious, to propaganda, to comical, but the best bit was the display of all the kinds of seized drugs by the the government troops, a nice display glass case with nice labels of all the drugs types but all the cases were empty! Looks like the staff had a good time at their Xmas party.
 |
| Enough gold to start a Spanish invasion. |
After that another cab ride to Shwedagon pagoda to check out one of the 'must sees' of Asia and we were not disappointed. It was gold, gold, gold everywhere you looked and the scale was impressive.
Take your shoes off though! We spent a while here people watching and monk spying as there was a shady gang of monks hanging out. Photos done we ambled back to the hotel and that night decided we were going for what is known as a Chinese hotpot. For the uninitiated, what this compromises is a boiling hot cauldron of soup in the middle of your table on a hotplate. We chose half spicy Szechuen and half chicken, and you go and choose your ingredients from the fridges. A waiter then collects everything and takes it to your table with beers etc and sets you up with everything you need to start cooking in the boiling soup. You put in what you want bit by bit like a fondue or put the lot in and have a big nosh up. It's a great way to socialise.
 |
| Betty from Coronation street never made a hot pot like this. |
Next day was Christmas day and we spent the morning playing cheesy Xmas tunes and opening presents which were extremely limited and mostly travel related and then off outside to the Peoples park via another taxi ride. The park was rammed with all the Burmese taking the day off so we chilled out in the shade with ice-creams as it was so hot. It had rides there like a log flume and roller coasters but the queues were too long and the sight of a gang of mechanics working on the roller coaster in front of the queue did not inspire confidence in us to have a go. It was all a bit surreal sitting there on Xmas day in 32c sun with shorts and scandals on watching Burmese people strolling about in their Sunday best.
As the afternoon shadows lengthened we headed downtown for the first time since being here and were really disappointed. It was traffic choked, polluted, noisy, crowded and dingy. We wandered about for a little while but were uninspired so decided to head for an area called beer street (19th street to the locals) which was a bit of a dive to be honest but had a lot of character and made for some good pavement banter as the beers were cheap on draught and cold so went down quicker than we planned for. After watching all the flies hanging out on all the food stuffs on display spreading their assortment of bowel moving bacteria we decided it would be wise to eat somewhere with a bit more hygiene orientated in nature. Funny enough we thought we could get a Christmas dinner but no chance, as it was impossible just to find somewhere that flies were not part of the meal being served. Eventually we found a nice gaff that was a bit upmarket but had to settle for Pad Thai for Christmas dinner as fermented fish head stew didn't really float our boat.
 |
| Kathy digs into her 4th or maybe 6th beer on Beer street. |
Another taxi back to the room which took ages as all the streets were gridlocked with the evenings Xmas celebrations and treated ourselves by cracking open a bottle of wine to round the night off.
In the morning we would pack as we have to head for the airport for our new year destination which is big, bad, Bangkok.
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