Semuc Champey

Being the super suspicious characters we are, we withheld some payment to our tour operator Mikes Travels in case there was some scam coming around the corner to relieve us of more money. As the trip only cost £15 each, which included admission fees of £11 and a guide, transport, river tubing and waterfall jumping I was apprehensive about how he could promise so much with such a small price. After all you soon find out in life you only get what you pay for and if it is too cheap than it probably does not exist. Don't know who Mike was who owned the company but our guide was going to be the guy who sold us the package who I think was called Carlos but names come and go so quickly we forgot by the end of the day. We also had an issue with paying him as his 'office' was just the side passage in his house with an old rickety chair and a home made desk which did not inspire us it was a bonafide business but this is quite normal in the small ramshackle jungle town. We decided to meet Carlos at his office rather than our resort in case the transport did not show up, we could have it out with him on his home turf. Sure enough when we arrived at the prearranged time, Carlos was missing, just an empty can of beer sitting where he had once been the day before.

This bad ass guy was giving us a moody eye as we passed him on the trail.

 We took a seat anyway as we had nothing else to do wondering if we had been scammed or not. Soon after some young guy who we had never met showed up, jabbering Spanish at us and we just about managed to pick out that he knew about our booking. Unreassured, we sat there not having a clue what was going on, with that empty can of beer looking at us that we had probably paid for with our deposit and Carlos had enjoyed drinking, chuckling to himself about how stupid Brits are for handing over money to strangers in the jungle who pretend to be tour operators. Then 10 minutes later our hero Carlos showed up full of beans after sending off his latest instalment of onward bus passengers to their individual destinations and was back to take control of the day. "Vamos" he declares with gusto and next thing we knew a beaten up old pick up had pulled onto the kerb along with 2 young Germans who came from nowhere, and we all bundled into the back of the truck which had a strange roll bar arrangement which we quickly found out was to hold onto as sitting was definitely not an option. Off we roared deeper into the jungle along a road that looked like one that had been bombed in places or the road builders could just not be bothered to create a level road surface. The scenery was majestic along the half hour journey, as we picked up locals along the way and dropped them off, being thrown around in the back, frequently getting ' air time' as we tackled to uneven road at speed. To be honest it was scary but exhilarating at the same time. One wrong turn and we would be rolling down the side of the steep mountain to our deaths which made it all the more fun. The Germans were loving it as well and turned out being really cool guys who both spoke decent English.

Did you ever see a pool so clear and so pale blue?

  First stop were the caves. We knew we were going to get wet so hired some reef shoes as we felt our sandals were not going to cut it inside. Turned out it was an excellent decision as one of the German guys broke his sandal and ended up barefoot which looked a tad painful. What happens here in the caves is basically they are unlit, pitch black, so to help you find your way they give you a candle. It's very high tech stuff you know. Then our guide Carlos turned completely loco and painted our faces with candle grease into individual characters. I was Rambo, Kathy was the V for vendetta guy, and the Germans were Braveheart and Predator. Into the cave we bound, first in shallow water but later it went over our heads so we had to swim without quenching the candles in the water or you were plunged into your own personal dark patch. The guide led the way howling like a wolf and cackling away like a madman. For the next hour and a half we climbed a waterfall in the dark, had to slip through a tiny letterbox slot of cascading water into a blind dark recess of a pool and pull ourselves along guide ropes in dark caverns in water that we had no idea how deep it was. At the end there was a small pool where the guide encouraged you to climb to a ledge on the side of the cave and jump off what I estimate to be a 10-20ft drop into blackness which you had no idea how deep it was or if it was full of jagged rocks. I thought the guide would show us how to do it but no, he would not so there was no way I was going to do it as his entertainment but luckily the Germans were more gung ho and survived the jump so I plucked up the courage and jumped and glad to report no injuries were sustained but Kathy decided it was a foolish encounter and best left to the macho man crowd. Very wise. She did though get duped into wedging herself into a letterbox waterfall by the guide which shaved her hips down a couple of inches to allow her to plunge through the gap into the darkness before anybody else. We were also hopeless at keeping the candles alight so spent most of the time asking the guide for a light or just groping around in the darkness following the guide up ahead. It was the most mad and insane thing we have done for a long time but at the same time was an awesome and totally different experience. We loved it.

Kathy said the sweaty climb to the lookout was unromantic to my armpit hygiene.

   No time to rest though, it was off to the waterfall to climb another ledge and jump again into the river at the base of the waterfall. This time it was about 25ft high and in daylight but we still had no idea how deep the pool was. Luckily the mad cap Germans who clearly did not value their lives or take into account of the non existent health care that Guatemala provides, went first, and survived so I followed after being reassured my life would continue for the time being. Again Kathy decided such foolishness was best left to the testosterone crew. We swam around in the pools at the base of the waterfall, under it so you could go behind it then back to shore. We had never seen a pool of water with such a luminescent blue colour in our lives. It was stunning.
  But again, no time to rest as Carlos had us onto the inner tubes and out into the river to drift lazily down stream trying to avoid the large limestone rocks jutting out like monoliths along the coarse. Back to base and we handed back our reef shoes. Mine were ruined, with my big toe protruding through it highlighting my very painful broken off big toe nail. Kathy's were from Primark and survived very well. Go Primark!

Howler monkey get blase to the constant tourist attention.

  Next was a 40 minute break for lunch then we were handed over to another guide who also spoke good English and was even madder than Carlos. We can't remember his name but he had the most insane laugh - like a hyena on laughing gas. He took us up to the viewpoint for The Semuc Champey limestone falls which was a hot and energy sapping steep climb to the summit but we were rewarded with a troupe of howler monkeys crossing our path and a lizard who looked like it had come out of Jurassic park. Our guide kept us entertained with stories, showing us jungle medicinal plants, wild herbs and spices and just generally being a looney. He was a great laugh and really made the trip.After the viewpoint we went down to the pools and he guided us from the top pool down to the bottom pools. At each  pool lip we had to either dive off the side or slide down on a natural rock formation on our arses. He would of course enter each pool with a forward or back flip.
We finished up overlooking the waterfall at the end where the water came out from the underground river. We can not describe just how beautiful these pools were. The camera just can't capture the beauty of it all.

Unfortunately these two spoilt what would have been a perfect view.

The aqua blue pools, the lush green jungle backdrop, the rolling steep limestone jagged hills on the horizon, the blazing sun and the bluest sky. It was indeed one of the most magnificent places we had visited in our last 11 months of travelling the world. The sun started to set later so we packed up and were herded back into the back of the pick up for the return journey but made sure we tipped the guide, which we never do usually but this was an exception. Even the usually tight money efficient Germans cleared their wallet cobwebs for Crazy Laugh so he probably had a few beers that night. Well deserved. Dropped off back at the office we try to pay for our bus tickets but Carlos told us not to worry about it and just pay the driver in the morning. We could barely walk back to the resort as my knees were shot from all the action and Kathy had a few wounds to lick as well but all totally worth it as a really solid day out for hardly any money whatsoever.

Blue wonder pool.